funny pictures and bizarre news

Though more than eight years have passed since 9/11 transformed Osama Bin
Laden into the world’s most wanted man, the Saudi Arabian warlord remains at
large. The U.S. government’s persistent (and, so far, fruitless) plans to catch
Bin Laden were recently cast in doubt by
Attorney
General Eric Holder’s prediction that he’ll never be captured alive. Here’s
a look back at some of the more radical entrapment schemes people have suggested
along the way:

1. A teleportation miracle
Back in 2005, "Military futurists" at Edwards Air Force Base Research Lab were
reportedly attempting to pioneer Star Trek-like teleportation technology with an
eye to "beaming" soldiers across long distances. One day,

predicted military spokesman Ranney Edwards in the San Francisco Chronicle,
this would allow the U.S. to teleport soldiers into "a cave, tap Bin Laden on
the shoulder, and say: ‘Let’s go.’"

2. An airborne bear squad

Osama bin Laden: An artist’s rendering

According
to Stars and Stripe, an anonymous letter writer informed the
Pentagon, accurately, that a bear’s sense of smell is more acute than a
bloodhound’s. "Trained bears with GPS and day/night cameras around their necks
might be able to hunt down [Bin Laden's] scent," wrote the unnamed amateur
strategist. His proposal involved dropping bears wearing "parachutes that
self-destruct after landing" into Western Pakistan — everyone knows how much
difficulty bears have taking those things off.

3. A robot army of killer bees
The Pentagon has tried

training bees to smell bombs. But a small nanotechnology firm has

reportedly gone further, claiming it could design "little drones that are
the size of bumblebees" with the capacity to hunt down and kill terrorists.
Perhaps the $25
million reward for capturing OBL is part of the revenue forecast?

4. Psychic spies
The British Ministry of Defense reportedly spent $27,000 recruiting psychics to
locate Bin Laden’s hideaway in 2002.

According to the Daily Mail, the Brits recruited 12 amateur
psychics to see whether their sixth sense could be used to "remotely view" the
terrorist’s secret headquarters. Ultimately, it seems, defense chiefs concluded
there was "little value" in mobilizing the would-be mind-readers. 

5. Wildlife distribution technology (a.k.a. Pretending he’s an animal)
Geographers at UCLA triumphantly announced in 2009 they had discovered Osama’s
hiding place using state-of-the-art "wildlife distribution technology." Based on
how animals behave in the wild,

said Thomas Gillespie to the NY Times, we can deduce he is "closest
to the point where he was last reported" and "within a region that has a similar
physical environment and cultural composition." UCLA posited this was a tribal
village named Parachinar. Unfortunately, no one has yet followed up on the
prediction.